What's your favorite rom-com?

Romantic comedies ... everybody loves 'em. Well, maybe not everybody (my husband much prefers westerns and James Bond!) So what's your favorite rom-com? "Sleepless in Seattle"? "You've Got Mail"? The author of our book mentioned that "Titantic" was the number one grossing romantic drama of all time (at least so far). Jen Wilkin then compared Jack and Rose's lusty love story to a couple in Dallas, Texas that, at the writing of the book, was celebrating their 75th wedding anniversary. Talk about lasting love. Curious, I goggled their names -- Jack and Lucille Cannon -- and found the news story featuring their celebration: click here for a sweet story about a couple in their 90s whose love hasn't been sensational, just steady and supportive.

Ah, love, so complicated and multi-faceted. We look for examples around us but everyone else's love story seems better than ours. OR we confuse "love" for warm feelings and wonder why we don't "feel" fulfilled.

I'm so thankful we have God's Word and Jesus' example to help clear away the fog of what love truly is.

Like, Love, or Lust

Part of the issue with understanding love is that we have just one word in the English language for LOVE but, in the Greek, there are at least 4 (yep, take a minute to google and you may find more!).

Eros: romantic, sensual, even sexual love (think 'erotic')

Philia (or phileo): brotherly, affectionate love; feelings; bonds formed through shared experience (used 54 times in the NT)

Storge:Parent's love for child

Agape: Selfless, unconditional love; "act of the will;" a love that acts; choosing; intellect; looking out for the interests of the one being loved (Rom. 5:8; John 13:35); used 259 times in the NT ... remember the importance of repetition from last week? Yep, this should get our attention!

This week's chapter we're looking at in In His Image is "God Most Loving." Our challenge is the call to obedience in this. In keeping with our overarching questions: "What is the will of God in your life" related to THIS characteristic? "To love as you have been loved" (42).

How Are We Going to Get There?

Let's start by thinking through this quote from p. 38:

Unless we love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, we will love ourselves and our neighbors inadequately. RIGHT LOVE of GOD is what enables right love of self and others."

God is LOVE. It is WHO He is. Remember last week? Nothing you can do can make Him stop loving you. Nothing you can do can make Him love you more. Jesus loves you (sing through the first verse and chorus to remind yourself:  Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so. Little ones to Him belong; they are weak but He is strong. Yes, Jesus loves me; yes, Jesus loves me; yes, Jesus loves me, the Bible tells me so.)

The question really comes down to DO YOU LOVE HIM RIGHTLY? Sure, we've been commanded to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, but do you? Is there evidence in your life ...

• not just the cross around your neck
• what about the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control?
• what about holy living?
• what about holy talking?

Is He "rubbing off" on you?

Also on p. 38, Jen Wilkin writes,

A deficit in our love of neighbor always points to a deficit in our love of God. We must first focus on loving God rightly.

This reminds me of John's words in 1 John 4:7-8:

7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. 

John's words are very direct ... he cuts to the chase ... God loves us so we need to love one another. You don't love? Then perhaps you don't know God! Ouch!

But, John, you don't know my challenges and my difficult person ....

Jen Wilkin addresses this on p. 42:

"If love is an act of the will -- not motivated by need, not measuring worth, not requiring reciprocity -- then there is no such category as unlovable."

Let that sink in and then remember Rom. 5:8 again: While we were STILL sinners, Christ died for us.
While we were STILL unlovable ... self-centered ... not caring about Him or His Word, He died for us. He 'agaped' us ... dying was an "act of His will" ... He chose to be our sacrifice so that we could be restored to relationship with God His Father!

1 Corinthians 13: The Love Chapter
Since we're exploring what it's going to take for us "to love as we have been loved," it's important that we take a trip to 1 Corinthians 13 to be reminded of the Apostle Paul's definition of love ... what  it is and what it's not. And lest we get distracted by his poetic words and forget that he's writing this letter to a church that's needing a course correction due to big heads and worldly influence, remember that chapter 13 falls right in the middle of Paul's discussion of spiritual gifts. He's emphasizing in a number of ways that LOVE, not spiritual gifts, is what's most important.

Take a minute to read the chapter ... maybe even outloud. (Click here for the NIV.)

Did you hear it? Love is more important than speaking well, prophesying well, or giving well. All of these gifts are good but, if done without love, you're wasting your time because it's not pointing people to Jesus. Of course, this makes me wonder how this translates to what I do on a regular basis -- both in academics and at church. Am I teaching in love? Here's how Jim Fowler put it:

1 Corinthians 13 for Teachers ¹ If I teach with the best educational techniques, and provide stimulating and motivational lessons, but have not love, I am but a time-wasting information processor. ² If I spend hours preparing my lesson plans with the clearest instructional objectives, but have not love, I am just an over-organized ideologue. ³ If I utilize the most eye-catching visual aids and the latest classroom technology, but have not love, I am just a high-tech visionary. ⁴ A loving teacher is kind and patient with every student, regards each student as an important individual, and treats their personal problems with confidence.
 ⁵ A loving teacher does not merely talk at, but relates to, the students, and provides a exemplary model of life to those in the classroom.
 ⁶ A teacher’s love is not condescending, does not play favorites,does not gossip, does not publicly humiliate, is not easily agitated or discouraged, and does not blow-up or give-up on misbehaving students. ^7-8a A teacher’s love bears the responsibility of instruction, believes that student’s minds should not be wasted, hopes that every student will achieve their potential, and endures all disturbances in the process. ^8b-12 The latest text-books will soon be out-of-date. Contemporary teaching methods will become outmoded. Educational technology is obsolete before we know it, but a loving teacher can affect a student’s life forever.
 ¹³ Now abideth preparation, instruction, and love. But the greatest of these is a teacher’s love that seeks the highest good of the students.

I'd encourage you to try this yourself with your vocation or hobby or volunteer service ... consider what it is you do, what it comes across as without love, what love is -- and is not -- in this context, and so on. You can use the template below if it helps:

¹ If I _____________________________________________ but do not have love, I am only ____________________________________________________________________________.

² If I _____________________________________________ and if I ___________________ ___________________________, but have not love, I am just ________________________.

³ If I _____________________________________________ and _____________________ ________________________, but have not love, I am just __________________________.

^4-5 In my setting, love is _______________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________________.

⁶ In my setting, love is not _____________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________

⁷ In my setting, love always ____________________________________________________.

^8-12 ________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________

¹³ And now these three remain, ____________________, ___________________________,

and love. But the greatest of these is love.

One Last Thing

Before I wrap up this week, I want to go back to a quote on page 40 in In His Image that really grabbed my attention:

When God acts in ways we perceive to be unloving, the problem is not with HIS actions but with OUR limited perspective.

As we're challenged to love others as we are loved, we're taken back to the reminder that our love for others hinges on how we love Him. So, in light of this quote, it begs the following questions:

• Do you trust Him enough to love Him?
• Do you love Him enough to trust Him?

In review, as we consider what God's will is for our lives -- or in keeping with the premise of this book of reflecting the image of the One who created us -- we have learned that we are to be holy as God is holy AND to love as we have been loved.

That'll keep us busy for this week!

Repetition and the Holiness of God

In Chapter 1 of In His Image, author Jen Wilkins talks about the value of repetition in helping us learn, so in an effort to get this week's lesson off to a fun start, I played the youtube video of Anita Renfroe's "Mom Song" (I used this one with only the lyrics so it would be easier to follow: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9SARUZEBT0).

Speaking of repetition, I'm notorious for repeating myself when it comes to reminding students to get registered ON TIME. Over the last few weeks, I became a broken record: "Registration deadline is Friday, August 17 at 4 p.m." How long before I have to be registered? "Friday, August 17 at 4 p.m." I'll give it some thought and pray about what to take. "That's fine, just be sure to register by Friday, August 17 at 4 p.m." Repetition ... the mother of learning.

In the spirit of repetition, let's review key points from our introduction to the book last week:

• This semester we're learning to ask "the better question." Instead of "What is God's will for my life?", we want to ask "Who does God want me to be?"
• God is always more concerned with the decision-maker than He is with the decision itself (12). Jen gives the example of Peter ... he had the choice to acknowledge Jesus or deny Him. He chose poorly but Jesus still reached out to restore Peter after the resurrection.
• God does not hide His will from His children (13). "Try and guess what will make me happy?" NO! God's word gives us His direction as well as Jesus' example to follow.
• God's will for our lives is that we would be like Christ (16). We are called to "be conformed to His image" ... the image we were created in (see Gen. 1:27) but got messed up big time two chapters later when Eve chose her way over God's.

And it's THIS image that we were created in ... created to reflect ... that we are studying over the next couple of months.

INCOMMUNICABLE AND COMMUNICABLE

As we try to wrap our minds around our task for this study, we were quickly introduced in Chapter 1 to TWO types of character traits / attributes of God: incommunicable and communicable. I confess that -- at first (and second and third reading) -- I had to stand on my tiptoes ... this stuff is WAY over my head!

• Incommunicable Attributes: those traits that are true of God alone. Only God is infinite, eternal, immutable, omnipresent, omniscient, omnipotent, and sovereign. "When we strive to become like Him in any of these traits, we set ourselves up as His rival" (21). Remember that we were created to bear the image of God, not to be what only He can be. He is God and we are not! Job got a taste of this in his lengthy conversation with God (check out Job 38 to the end of the book!).
• Communicable Attributes: those traits of God that can become true of us as well: holy, loving, just, good, merciful, gracious, truthful, patient, and wise. "When we talk about 'conforming to the image of Christ,' THIS is the list we are describing" (22). Our hope is that in studying each of these communicable attributes, we will learn how to reflect who God is as Christ did.

GO BIG OR GO HOME

There's no easing into this study with a simple attribute ... NO, we're starting with the one mentioned the MOST in the Bible ... over 700 times (900 if you count the verb form) ... here's that repetition thing!

Holiness "can be defined as the sum of all moral excellency, 'the antithesis of all moral blemish of defilement'. It carries the ideas of being set apart, sacred, separate, of possessing utter purity of character" (22-23). Holiness is what sets God apart ... see bottom of p. 23 for contrast with other gods not being concerned with being holy.

Back to the repetition thing ... in addition to the number of times God's holiness is mentioned in the Bible, Wilkin points out how repetition is used in one place for extra emphasis. She explained that rabbis sometimes repeated words twice for emphasis but R.C. Sproul offered this about Rev. 4:8 & Isa. 6:3:

Only once in Scripture is an attribute of God elevated to the third degree. Only once is a characteristic of God mentioned three times in succession. The Bible says that God is holy, holy, holy. Not that He is merely holy, or even holy, holy. He is holy, holy, holy. The Bible never says that God is love, love, love; or mercy, mercy, mercy; or wrath, wrath, wrath; or justice, justice, justice. It does say that he is holy, holy, holy, that the whole earth is full of his glory. (Sproul, The Holiness of God, 25).

So, if God's holiness is something we not only need to know about but also reflect ... HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN?

"The Bible presents holiness as both GIVEN to us and ASKED of us" (25). Consider these terms: positional holiness and practical (or progressive) holiness.

Positional holiness is the gift given to us because of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross. Hebrews 10:10 "...We have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once and for all." Our sin earned us eternity in hell with the enemy (see 1st part of Romans 6:23) but Jesus' death on the cross bought us eternity in heaven with God (rest of Romans 6:23).

Practical holiness: what are you going to do with the free gift you've been given? Open it and put it aside as decoration? Or open it and put it to use! Why? Because we're told over and over in the Word, Be holy as I am holy. (Lev. 11:44-45, 19:2, 20:7, 20:26; 1 Peter 1:14-16; 1 Thess 4:3,7)

Simply put, God's will for your life is that you be holy! (27)

Caution: Be careful not to limit your understanding to moral purity. Joel Scandrett in his article "What does God mean when he asks us to be holy as he is holy?" points out the following:

Prior to any consideration of morality, biblical holiness describes a unique relationship that God has established and desires with His people. This relationship has moral ramifications, but it precedes moral behavior. Before we are ever called to be good, we are called to be holy. Unless we rightly understand and affirm the primacy of this relationship, we fall into the inevitable trap of reducing holiness to mere morality. (christianitytoday.com/biblestudies... 2/28/2012)

I like how Jen Wilkin describes "growing in godliness" as a "process of acclimation" (28). She told a story of visiting Detroit in the dead of winter with clothes she might have worn on a cold day in Texas. She was ill-prepared ... but then talked about how her Texan brother had to learn new habits once he moved there to be better prepared for Michigan winters. He had to get acclimated.

As those who have been made holy, "we learn to behave like the children of God and not the children of wrath" (28). We throw some things off; we put some things off (remember study of Colossians 3:1-17?). It's a process ... a lifelong process ... but what will this look like THIS week? Don't get lulled to sleep but the words "lifelong process." Stay engaged; stay looking for opportunities to pursue holiness every single day!

One more thought ... comes from an article by Joe Carter, "How to Become Holy" (June 24, 2016):

As believers, we are to be holy not because we want to be loved by God but because we are already loved in Christ. We love because He first loved us (1 John 4:19). And the best way to show that we love God is by seeking to become holy because He is holy.

There's nothing you can do to make God stop loving you. There's nothing you can do to make Him love you more. He loves you. Live a live of holiness in response to this love.

INTRODUCTION to In His Image (Jen Wilkin)

So, who do you think I look like? My mom or my dad? Most people think I resemble my mom but I definitely have some of my dad's characteristics which, of course, makes sense since he's, well, my dad. :)

Sarah gets tickled when people tell her she looks like a mix of Allen and me. "How I am supposed to respond?" she says. "I mean, it's better to look like a mix of y'all than someone else, right?"

It's perfectly normal for us to look like our parents -- or a mix of the two. It reminds me of the nature vs. nurture debate over the years. We look like our parents because of genetics but we sometimes act like them because of nurture. Bottom line is we pick up traits of people around us.

As those who claim God as Heavenly Father, we know we have another influence in our lives. We see this first in Genesis 1:27, "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." 

Created in the image of God ... not an exact replica ... but created to reflect Who and What He is!

In the book we're studying this semester In His Image, we are challenged to stop asking "What is God's will for my life?" and, instead, to ask "Who does God want me to be?" If we focus on the WHO instead of the WHAT, we have a quick and directed answer: Be like the very image of God!

Check out this progression if, indeed, we understand that God's will for our lives is that we be like Christ:

Romans 8:29 "For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers."

But why be conformed to "the image of His Son"?

Colossians 1:15 "He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation."

Hebrews 1:3 Christ is "the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of His nature."

How can we know how to do this?

1 Peter 2:21 "For to this you have been called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in His steps."

What's the bottom line here?

1 John 2:6 "Whoever says he abides in Him ought to walk in the same way in which He walked."

Jen Wilkin points out that this is not just about actions. "If we focus on actions without addressing our hearts, we may end up merely as better behaved lovers of self. Think about it. What good is it for me to choose the right job if I'm still consumed with selfishness.... A lost person can make 'good choices.' But only a person indwelt by the Holy Spirit can make a good choice for the purpose of glorifying God" (13-14).

This reminds me of Jesus' words in Matthew 5:16, "Let your light shine before me, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."

So why this book?

• Pretty cover and good price (Lifeway's July half-off sale caught my attention!)
• Author is well-known Bible study author (https://www.jenwilkin.net/)
• The title ... it is a phrase I used for signing letters and emails since early adulthood (maybe because of my photography; maybe because I was compelled even then to consider what it would mean to be created in the image of God).
• The synopsis on the back cover clinched it. (In addition to the "Who should I be?" redirect, the back cover text included: "Through Christ, the perfect reflection of the image of God, we will discover how God's own attributes impact how we live, leading to freedom and purpose as we follow His will and are conformed to His image." WOW!

Jen Wilkin states on page 17 the purpose of the book: "So this is a book that intends to, once and for all, answer the question of God's will for our lives. It intends to illuminate the narrow path for those of us who have grown forgetful of its existence or have wondered if it can be found."

She points out that the answer we are looking for is not hidden. It shows itself to those who have learned to ask, "Who should I be?" It shows itself to those whose "deepest desire and dearest delight" is to be remade ... IN HIS IMAGE ... one carefully placed step at a time (17).

My mom passed away almost 18 years ago at age 66. So many times I wish I could ask her for advice about a difficult situation or ask how she did something or just talk. But I can't. I've got photo books and other memorabilia but it's not the same as having her here.

God has left us with so much ... His Holy Spirit to guide us ... Jesus' example to follow ... His Word as "a lamp to our feet and a light to our path" ... we don't have to guess. We can move forward confidently, knowing He wants us to know Him and to copy His attributes. 

Lord, don't let us get distracted by hard stuff. Instead, keep us focused on who you are calling us to be and to keep this the main thing. How I pray for a heart that is not content with "good enough." I want to be like You.

Taming the Tongue

I wish everyone could have a "Jay Wolf" in their lives.

In this week's study, Poppy asked, "What negative or positive words have had a lasting impact on your life?" Being a glass-half-full person, I immediately thought of Jay Wolf and the positive words he spoke into the life of an almost-21-year-old during the summer of 1980.

I was a summer intern at Memorial Baptist Church in Metairie, Louisiana, and he was my "boss." As youth minister, Jay hired me to work alongside Kenny Culotta for 10 weeks in a summer that included a lot of pool parties and Bible studies as well as the obligatory mission trip and summer camp. Such good stuff! While I had been working with youth through the Youth Life ministry in Baton Rouge for the previous three years, this summer experience escalated my love for pouring into young people with the promises from God's word.

After each gathering (whether big or small), Jay always had a word of encouragement for me. Perhaps he saw the self-doubt that raged in my insecurity during those days. Or perhaps he is an amazingly encouraging person and always chose the route of "build up" and "benefit" that Ephesians 4:29 talks of. Either way, if you look up the word "encourager" in the dictionary, Jay's picture will be right there! He allowed his words to be used for good.

That's what James was wanting to highlight in his words on "the tongue" ... lots of potential for good and not-so-good!

What do we know about James? "It has been believed, since at least the third century, that the author of this book is James, the brother of Jesus. James probably wrote his letter to Jewish believers between A.D. 45-50. These early Christians has fled Jerusalem after persecution erupted following the killing of Stephen, which left them without direct contact with the apostles. Reports of their difficulties and struggles reached James in Jerusalem, and he responded as their pastor, urging them to make needed changes in both their personal lives and corporate relationships" (Speaking Wisely, 57).

In the first chapter, James introduces some thoughts on "the tongue" in verses 19-22 and 26, setting the stage for what he wants to say later. But for now, he points out that what it's better to listen than to jump to conclusions by talking and getting angry. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Interesting that he throws in the phrase "humbly accept the word planted in you;" in other words, your opinion isn't the most important thing ... God's is.

In 1:26, James boldly points out, "If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless." Ouch! Strong words!

James jumps back on the subject in chapter 3 with a little more direction. Consider these points borrowed from Brent Alderman of the Capitol Commission:

• ACCOUNTABLE POSITION

In verse 1, we see a simple but strong warning to teachers. Be careful what you wish for: with privilege comes responsibility. We are accountable for what we say, for what we teach. Just the sheer quantity of our words can trip us up at times. In Mt. 12:36-37, Jesus said, "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned."

Paul said it a little differently to Timothy in 2 Tim. 2:15, "Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth."

But not just teachers are accountable.

• COMMON PROBLEM

See it verse 2? We ALL stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.

So what does "perfect" mean in this context? James says we ALL stumble, so it can't be perfect like we typically think of perfect. Consider the goal of every believer ... spiritual maturity. Paul talks about it in Ephesians 4 as what we're striving for ... in Philippians 1, he points out that this "perfection" won't be achieved until the day of Christ Jesus.

Winston Churchill said, "We are masters of the unsaid words, but slaves of those we let slip out." 

• UNEXPECTED POWER

In verses 6-8, James describes the power of the tongue ... with potential for great devastation if not tamed. One commentator said the tongue has "inordinate influence for being such a small part of the body." James effectively used the metaphors of a bit in a horse's mouth, a rudder on a ship, and a spark to start a fire to show the huge impact of a small thing.

Anyone who has been horseback riding, especially as an amateur like me, appreciates the role of the bit in the horse's mouth. We may fancy ourselves cowboys, yelling things like "giddy-up" and "whoa," but it's really the tug on the reins that directs the bit that makes the horse submit to the rider.

Not being much of a sailor myself, I conjure up images of nautical calamities that could possibly have been avoided or minimized if someone were at the helm of the ship, looking ahead for danger and guiding the boat's direction. The Titanic is the most notable (more because of the movie) but I also think of the freighter that rammed into the Riverwalk in New Orleans a bunch of years ago because the captain was asleep and, by the time he realized he was off-course, it was too late to correct.

Forest fires in California, Colorado, and even Tennessee are huge examples of the devastating consequences of neglected sparks left accidentally (and sometimes intentionally). One writer described those who don't tame the tongue as "spiritual arsonists, lighting careless fires that cause widespread destruction."

• HYPOCRITICAL PATTERN

Mary Kassian in Conversation Peace explained that "in the ancient world, swords were the most common weapons of war. The Bible tells us that during war, the Hebrews would make swords from their plowshares (Joel 3:10). A plowshare is the cutting edge of  plow -- the agricultural tool that cuts furrows in the soil and prepares the ground for planting. The word plow literally means 'to open up the soil.' ...The edge of the plow cuts through the ground like a rudder cuts through the water. It was this cutting edge that the Hebrews used to make swords. When peace returned, the Hebrews hammered the swords back into plows (Isa. 2:4; Mic. 4:3). The edge that killed the enemy in times of war was the same edge that, in times of peace, provided the Hebrew community with food. The sharp edge had two functions" (14).

In James 3:9-12, the writer points out that our tongue can also have two functions but not as purposeful as the plowshare: praising and cursing. His brother Jesus basically called out the Pharisees for this in Mt. 12:34, "You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks."

It is this hypocritical pattern that gets us in trouble over and over. Alderman noted, "If we have a desire for God and his ways, we will avoid speaking in a way that betrays our faith. Hearts changed by the gospel will have observable fruit (including words) that is not hypocritical.... The heart is the key."

How important it is to know -- no, not just know but to process -- the potential we have for both using our tongue for good or for evil. What filters will we put in place to keep this from being our downfall time and time again? Poppy's questions should get us thinking:

• Why are praising God and cursing man incompatible for Christians?
• In what everyday circumstances might you be provoked to curse someone?
• When you are tempted to react this way, what changes in your thought patterns, attitudes, or behavior would help you resist?

Back to Conversation Peace (28-29):

"The mark of a good captain is to identify when the vessel is off course and make adjustments. In identifying the areas in which your speech needs adjustments, you are taking the first step toward getting back on course.

"If you look at a Canadian dime, you will find an image of Canada's most famous sailing vessel, the Bluenose. The Bluenose was strongly constructed to weather the rigorous challenges of North Atlantic fishing, but it was also built for speed. In 1921, she captured the International Fishermen's Trophy in a fierce competition between the best schooners in the word. She remained undefeated throughout her eighteen-year career.

"The captain of the Bluenose faced the same challenges of every seaman: wind, waves, squalls, storms. sandbars, reefs, and treacherous rocky shorelines. But he knew how to harness the Power of Navigation to guide his ship to victory. If you follow God's plan for your speech, you, too, will weather the rigorous challenges of life's sea, harness the Power of Navigation, and cross the finish line in victory."

A Busy Two Years

Has it really been two years since I uploaded a post? That's not good. So much has happened. So much swirls in my brain. Why am I not writing it down here? I've written some in my "Today is Going to Be a Great Day" journal but I want to do better posting here, when appropriate.

I came online to begin capturing thoughts from my new Disciple U Bible Study, "Speaking Wisely." We're using Poppy Smith's book of this title and are excited (and nervous) about working through this topic!

Week One (January 24 ... which we started a week late due to SNOW days!): Introduction

I set up a window on the stool as a prop to go with introductory statement in the book: "Words are like windows, giving others a glimpse into your heart. Words express who you really are, what you think, and what you cherish. They reveal your joys, heartaches, attitudes, and beliefs. Based on what you say and how you say it, others can sense whether you are a safe, loving, and supportive person, someone they can trust to speak wisely to them and about them. The opposite is also true" (p. 1).

WHY THIS STUDY?

1. Coming out of the Personal Holiness study

Last semester we worked through Rhonda Kelley's study on Personal Holiness. It was a tremendous overview of how God is calling us out to be holy just as He is holy. It seems that on the holiness journey, it's our words that trip us up more often than we expect. And according to Luke 6:43-45, "No good fruit bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit.... The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart.... For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks." If our words are reactionary, unnecessary, defensive, or offensive, what is this saying about our hearts?

2. Coming into a year of living out our Pastor's challenge to love God, love people, make disciples, and make a difference.

Love God: How are our words related to loving God? Is He changing our speech? Are we letting Him? Does our speech reflected our hearts for God?

Love people: What does this look like? How do we love people with our words? Jack Hudson posted a significant story on his Facebook page on January 15 that begins with the quote "A shut mouth gathers no foot."

A lady tells of a lesson her mother once taught her. One day, when this lady was about eight years old, she was playing outside next to an open window. Inside a neighbor was confiding a personal problem to her mother. After the neighbor had gone, the mother realized that her little girl had heard everything that had been said. She called her daughter in and said, "If our neighbor had left her purse here today, would we give it to anyone else?" "Of course not," the little girl said.

Her mother went on, "Our neighbor left something more precious than her pocketbook today. She left a story that could make many people unhappy. That story is not ours to give to anyone. It is still hers, even though she left it here. So we shall not give it to anyone. Do you understand?" The little girl did. And from that day on, whenever a friend would share a confidence or even engage in careless gossip, she considered what they said to be their personal property and not hers to give to anyone else.

This old saying bears great truth: "If you don't have something good to say about someone or something, don't say anything at all." Proverbs 13:3 "He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life: but he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction."

Make disciples: What does this look like? How can our words 'make disciples'? The most obvious answer is that we can use our words for God's good ... pointing others to the cross.

I was most impressed with a video my friend Lindsay Venters posted that shows a young girl sharing her faith using a three-circles strategy: https://www.facebook.com/23415837/videos/10108658727492725/. People, this is so impressive. Sure, she's memorized a witnessing plan but she's doing more than memorizing. She's sharing it. This video has over 2,000 views (probably half from her parents and/or church, but still!). Do you know how to share your faith as articulately as this child? If not, then join me in getting better at using words to make disciples!

Make a difference: The world is full of enough trash talk. It needs to hear words with a positive difference. I love this story about "being a Doris." (http://www.incourage.me/2018/01/be-a-doris.html) Synopsis of the story: Doris always answered the phone -- no matter who was calling because, well, she didn't know who was calling with no caller ID back in the 1980s -- "God loves you, This is Doris." Doris used her words to remind people they were treasured by God and who doesn't need that?

3. How are we going to do this?

In a recent reading of the first part of Psalm 119, I was reminded that the only way to get this "speaking wisely" is to be in the WORD. Living the Word. Obeying the Word. Speaking the Word. Not because it comes naturally but because I intentionally choose it. Best part is I don't have to make it up as I go along. I just need to follow what it says. That's the key to the "blessed" life.

Communication process is tricky. There's a sender encoding a message and receiver decoding a message. Best case scenario is that the message is heard as intended and feedback is given to confirm this. Of course, life is full of muddled scenarios instead of best case ones, so we've got to keep learning how to use our words carefully and purposefully. Thank the Lord for this study!

During the course of this semester, we'll attempt ...

• to be women whose words "build up" and "benefit" others (try to memorize Ephesians 4:29 in your favorite translation).
• to be women whose words "window" the heart of God, reflecting the good things stored in our hearts (Luke 6:23)
• to live "blessed" lives (as described in Psalm 119).

Finally, check out the song "Words" by Hawk Nelson ... he nails the dichotomy of words and the choices we have to make as we use them! https://youtu.be/anVweXDcxhA

"Words"

They've made me feel like a prisoner
They've made me feel set free
They've made me feel like a criminal
Made me feel like a king

They've lifted my heart
To places I'd never been
And they've dragged me down
Back to where I began

Words can build you up
Words can break you down
Start a fire in your heart or
Put it out

Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You

You can heal the heartache
Speak over the fear
(Speak over the fear)
God, Your voice is the only thing
We need to hear
(We need to hear)

Words can build us up
Words can break us down
Start a fire in our hearts or
Put it out

Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You
(Back to You)

Let the words I say
(Let the words I say)
Be the sound of Your grace
(Sound like Your grace)
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You

I wanna speak Your love
Not just another noise
Oh, I wanna be Your light
I wanna be Your voice

Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You
(Back to You)

Let the words I say
(Let the words I say)
Be the sound of Your grace
(Sound like Your grace)
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You
(Back to You)

Words can build us up
Words can break us down
Start a fire in our hearts
Or put it out

I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You 

Not good at goodbyes

Pondering the thought of leaving 'home' after 22 years on campus

I’m not good at goodbyes.

I like to meet people, make them feel welcome, and look for small ways to invest in their lives. I prefer to have an abundance of time to do this, rarely giving thought to the day we will be geographically separated.

When we came back to NOBTS in 1994 for my husband Allen to join the faculty, we began spending time with several student couples who were studying youth ministry. The fellowship was sweet and the energy of the mentoring relationships was reciprocal. However, when graduation rolled around for these couples, I found myself feeling frustrated and cheated. “God, why did you bring these precious people in our lives only to take them away?”

After another cycle or two of this, the rhythm became more natural and I found myself excited for students as they graduated and looked forward to the next thing God had in store for them outside the confines of the seminary gates and the burdens of relentless course requirements. Needless to say, I’ve said goodbye to quite a few in the last 22 years on campus.

Now it’s our turn to leave. This is not a leaving we have planned for years and years. It’s not one we anticipated like one does graduation. But it is one that has us looking forward to what God has in store outside the gates of this amazing institution. And, while we’re leaving behind the 504 in a physical sense, we will certainly stay connected with continuing opportunities to teach internet classes and in weekend workshops and seminars.

Some parting thoughts:

·         Wherever you are, be all there. When the search committee at our new church interviewed me, I was asked if I would miss NOBTS. I responded, “Of course, I will. We’ve been back in the city almost 22 years. It’s where I’m from and it’s where I raised my family. I put down roots and grew in so many ways. I love my job, my church, my city, and my school. How horrible it would have been for me to sit here and say that I wouldn’t miss it! If anything, this tells you that wherever I am, I plan to plug in and ask God to use me fully.” Please do the same.

·         Don’t miss the people. These words are challenging to me since I am a task-oriented person. My office mates will tell you that I am good at pulling off events and setting up systems. But I know, if I’m not careful, I can miss the people part of an event or system. So, let me encourage you to be careful. You’re surrounded by amazing people here on the NOBTS campus. They’re in the offices, bookstores, and coffee shop. They sit beside you in class and also stand in front of you in those same classes. Their personalities may be different from yours but they’re still valuable and important to know. Glean from their wisdom and experiences. Gleaning doesn’t mean taking it all in. As my son once said, “Chew the meat and spit out the fat.” Every person has something to offer. Find it.

·         Go ahead and smile. I know. Your mind is on a million different things but, gee golly, when you pass someone on the sidewalk, go ahead and smile. Sure, it may not be your primary personality trait to be outgoing and perky. But smile anyway. I’d rather NOBTS be known as the quirky seminary full of smiling Christians than a bunch of other taglines we can think of ourselves.

·         Find someone you can be real with. Transparency and honesty have been big buzz-words on campus this semester. No one denies that it’s hard to spill your guts to someone when that spilling might cost you your job, your ministry, and maybe even your family. But, perhaps, if we could allow ourselves to get into ‘real’ relationships along the way, then we might avoid a “Deepwater Horizon”-sized oil spill. However, if you find yourself between a rock and a hard place already, please, please, please phone a friend. In other words, grab a human being and offer to buy him/her a cup of coffee/tea/cola for a few minutes of time. Don’t assume this human being has all the answers but, chances are, he or she will know who to point you to.

You will continue to see us around campus for another month or so. Allen (the original Dr. Jackson) will be leading Youth Ministry Institute during the first January workshop slot. If you’re youth-ministry-minded, you should figure out how to be a part of this! It’s full of good information and quality networking opportunities. Then, after a little vacay to get our minds and bodies refueled, we’ll pack up the house and head east. Please take any and every opportunity to stop by the office or even the house to offer a hug and a hand but, just remember, I'm not good at goodbyes.

Except that Jesus ...

There's nothing extraordinary about a rainy day in Georgia. Or about looking at even more houses. Except that Jesus is in all of it.

In Matthew 4:18-22, I'm re-introduced to several of Jesus' earliest followers, all of whom were fishermen. They were born in a fishing village and taught to fish by their fathers as was the custom of their time. There was nothing extraordinary about Simon and Andrew or James and John ... not their names, not their hometowns, not their livelihoods. Except that Jesus handpicked them to follow Him and they did.

Except that Jesus ... I pray that as I get hung up with details of house hunting and moving and then trying to balance all of this with finishing well at the seminary, I will remember that, if not for Jesus in the center of it all, it would be nothing extraordinary. As a matter of fact, it might feel like unnecessary (and overwhelming) stress in my already-stressed life.

I was also distracted by the report in verse 22 that when Jesus called James and John to be His disciples, "immediately they left the boat and their father and followed Him." Again, I am struck at the huge discord this must have struck in this family ... even if they were devout Jews ... even if they were looking out for the Messiah. This father surely had plans for the family business that included his sons taking over in a few short years. Except that Jesus invited them into an extraordinary mission!

Oh, that my day -- my life -- would be open to the "except that Jesus" moments and callings!